Monday was the appointment with Dr. H I've been dreading. Unfortunately, Google is all too accessible. It makes me think I know things... like, when to stop taking prescribed medications. We tried a few, the side effects were too much, so I quit. I thought I was handling it just fine on my own, but she disagreed. First, she made me think we were good. She was happy with the weight loss (given all the holidays) and thrilled when she saw I was no longer pre-hypertensive. I went from 138/91 to 112/70- who knew diet and exercise could perform such miracles, eh? ;)
Then she started in on the anxiety/depression questions. Except she disguises them- you don't realize she's digging because she's asking normal stuff like, "How the diet's going... Really? You think you've hit a plateau?" She throws in several suggestions here, and some will absolutely not work with Phase 4. I tell her about Phase 4. She's cool with the water, she's not cool with 1200 calories day in and day out especially given the possible plateau. She suggests change, with calories and exercise routines. That's when I have my mini-breakdown right in the exam room. I say focused, she say's borderline obsessed. She lets me off without going back on a daily medicine- for now- but she insists on an as-needed medicine. If I have to refill it too soon, and she'll know because she's Dr. H, back to daily medicine it is.
So. I took the last few days to bounce some ideas off my BFF and another blogger-buddy, and reevaluate my goals. I really feel like I need the added accountability of another person, but I need it from someone with similar end goals. As Dr. H pointed out, I'm getting way too focused on a number. BFF completely agreed when I told her about the appointment (which, admittedly, I hadn't planned on telling anyone- but she brought up the subject and it just all poured out).
Now where does all of this leave me? Well, I dropped out of Phase 4 for starters. I think Allan's challenges have been wonderful and very eye-opening, and I wish all of the challengers success over the next few months. However, I no longer think it's the place for me although I did enjoy the accountability. I have my BFF for a lot of the dieting stuff (she lost almost 5lbs this week!!), and I've sought out an accountability partner with similar health and fitness goals to mine. While a smaller number on the scale is still a wonderful thing, we're both striving for overall improved health and physical fitness so it will be awesome having someone to push me, and vice versa.
I don't have a specific plan yet, though I'll be keeping the water amounts and the calories (although I'll be giving myself a little more flexibility than the 1200 day in and day out- one of Dr. H's suggestions to get past the plateau). Cardio will be 5 days a week, strength 3 days a week. I already follow what weight watchers calls the "good health guidelines" for the most part, but I'll be tweaking it some. One thing I'm looking at right now is using Spark People for tracking purposes. They have an app for the iPhone, which I like since I've been using my phone for tracking since the beginning. They also have the fitness section and I really loved the demo's for exercises. I know a lot of the basics, but let's be honest.. there are too many to memorize for us newbies! For those that use it- let me know what you love/hate about it!
So that's where I'm at right now. Getting back to the basics, focusing on my overall health instead of just the number on the scale, and enjoying the changes I'm making.
On a side note, Zumba was a blast Tuesday night with Steph. We haven't been since August, and I forgot how much I loved the energy you get from a class vs the DVDs. It's not the same at all-Tuesday nights are reserved for Zumba once again. And then I caught a stomach bug Wednesday. And tomorrow is the first weigh-in for our Biggest Loser contest at work, which I can almost say I'm not anxious about. Almost. I'll get there though.